You have been fighting and arguing for months and you are wondering how to save marriage? A great deal depends on the communication methods of you and your spouse. Other considerations include the basic cause of the arguments you have been having over the last few months. Are the arguments knock down drag out? Or do you have healthy discussions without anger and raised voices? Do you both listen carefully to what each other person has to say and then try to address each point in the discussion?
Marriage is a wonderful institution that no one seems to get any training for before they enter into it. You meet someone and fall in love and progress through the courtship and find that you want to spend the rest of your life with that special person and decide to get married. Some religions require you go through a brief marriage class before being allowed to be married in their church. These classes are designed more to acquaint you with the particulars of that church s doctrine versus what marriage will really be all about. There are even classes on child birthing, but why are there not classes regarding what will happen during a marriage and if things start to go wrong how to save a marriage?
Experts always say that having many things in common is an excellent way to a healthy marriage, but the biggest thing to have in common is an understanding of communication styles so that you are not alienating your spouse without even meaning to. Men and women have different communication styles and need to understand what a particular communication is supposed to mean. Women have a tendency to want to vent without their spouse offering an instant solution. The process of talking through what is going on is usually enough, but if a woman thinks her spouse is patronizing or not listening then frustration can build up. Understanding communication styles is a way to keep a marriage alive.
Other experts say that to avoid poisonous building up of anger and frustration you should never go to sleep angry. Both parties should always try to avoid raised voices and accusations and try to see the other point of view. This by no means should excuse either party if they have done something seriously wrong, but neither party should let things build up until there is an explosion and both parties say things that they should not. It is human nature to try to hurt the person that you feel has hurt you, but the situation needs to be looked at objectively and both people need to address the situation in a positive manner.
Keeping secrets is a sure way to have conflict and strife so to avoid arguments and thoughts of divorce or separation you should not keep secrets from each other. The best way to save marriage is to not get to the point where one or the other wants to get out of the marriage.