Being a parent is never easy, but nowadays people have to be especially flexible, as all kinds of new family situations are coming about. Sixty years ago most marriages were "until death do us part." That is no longer the norm. In fact, approximately 50% of all marriages end in divorce. Because of this state of affairs, theres a good chance that you will end up in a marriage that includes stepchildren. Among other things, this report will pinpoint the insights you need to adapt to being a stepparent.
To start the relationship off in a positive direction, family meetings should be held on a regular basis. A meeting should be convened from time to time where everyone in the family can sit down and chat about what is on their mind. When you first find yourself in the position of being a step parent, your role can be a little uncertain at first. The reason you want to do this is to form an open dialogue with the step children is so they felt comfortable talking with you about concerns they may have. As long as your spouse encourages his or her children to talk with you, they are supporting your role and helping establish this new relationship. By doing this, everything will be out in the open and any issues can be discussed and dealt with expediently. Another important tip is to spend quality time alone with each child in the event there is more than one in your new household. You dont differentiate between your children and your stepchildren. This applies to all of them as a matter of course. Each child has his or her own interests, needs and problems and you have to make time to learn about these. One of the best ways to bond with a child is to participate in an activity they enjoy, such as a game or sport. Tutoring a child who is challenged by a school subject or helping a child practice the piano for an upcoming (scary) recital are just some of the ways you can help them get through the rough spots in their lives. If you have more than one child in your family, dont lump them together and treat them like an Army platoon. Each child is a real, individual person and you must recognize that.
Be sure to focus upon your primary relationship, the relationship between you and your spouse, and simply try your best to nurture one with the step children. To build a strong foundation and the potential for a good relationship with your new stepchildren, gradually move into your position with your words and actions. Over time, of course, its likely that youll get closer to the children and, depending on how old they are, may even take on the role of parent. To make this as easy as possible, simply be a helpful figure in your role until you are accepted at some point by the stepchildren. Consider in your mind that all of you are having to adjust to this new situation and it will take a little bit of time.
In conclusion, bringing children into a new marriage is never easy and will offer challenges above and beyond those of starting a new marriage without children. Today, as about half of all marriages end in divorce, and people are more likely to start new relationships later in life, the role of step parent is becoming ever more common. Give a lot of thought to the best role you should assume with your new step-kids and remember, its very important to "go with the flow" and exercise patience in order to succeed.