Weddings are exciting and emotionally charged. It seems like all too often, what should be the happiest time in a bride s life ends up full of conflict with her family and friends. To help you avoid wedding drama before it even starts, put these tips to work for you.
Choose Your Bridal Party Carefully. Okay, if you have any sisters, they will pretty much need to be bridesmaids no matter what, but beyond that, take some time to carefully consider whom you would like to have in your bridal party. For goodness sake, don t pick your bridesmaids based on how pretty they are or other superficial standards! The beautiful girl who is going to be a diva, complain that you should have bought more expensive bridesmaid gifts, and get drunk and rowdy at your reception is no asset, no matter how pretty she looks in the bridesmaid dress. Choose your bridesmaids based on their character and the genuine affection you have for them. It certainly does not hurt if they also happen to be very organized and have great taste as well.
Involve Your Mother in Law. The overbearing mother in law is a legendary creature, one that is sometimes based on fact. If you think your fiance s mother is going to meddle in your wedding planning and drive you crazy, make a preemptive strike. Ask her for assistance in some minor areas of the wedding, such as picking out favors and bridesmaid gifts. If she has a defined role, she will feel useful, and be much more likely to try to take over the entire event.
Be Realistic About Your Budget. No one wants to start off their married life mired in debt, nor should the bride s family be forced to spend more than they can possibly afford. A large percentage of wedding disagreements center around money, so if you have your finances in order from the beginning, you will find there is much less to fight about. One important thing to keep in mind is that anyone who is contributing to the wedding expenses can realistically expect to have a say in how the money is spent. If complete control is what you desire, the only feasible way to get it is to pay for the wedding yourself.
Be Equitable About the Guest List. After money, the guest list is one of the biggest potential fights that a bride and groom have with their families. One way to keep things fair is to determine the number of guests whom you can afford to host, and then divide it up into equal sections. Usually, 1/3 of the list goes to the bride s parents, another 1/3 to the groom s parents, and the last 1/3 to the bride and groom. Whatever you do, please do not make the number of guests someone is allotted dependent on their financial contribution. Specifically this means that even if the bride s family is paying for most of the wedding as custom dictates, the groom s parents should still get to invite an equal number of guests from their side of the family. It is the gracious thing to do, and it will help to nip those nasty guest list fights in the bud.
Remember That a Wedding is Not Only the Bride s Day. When the bride herself is the one causing wedding planning drama, it is usually because she is acting like a prima donna. Sure, the bride is the center of attention at any wedding, but the event is not only about her. It should be a magical time for all involved, from the wedding party to the guests to the groom himself. A bride who keeps the feelings and comfort of others in mind while planning her wedding will find it easy to avoid falling into the “bridezilla” trap and to plan a wedding that is a joy from start to finish.
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