Few individuals enjoy criticism, especially when it appears the other person's intent is to harm or manipulate. However it is not the intent or nature of the criticism that actually makes the difference; it's how you interpret and accept it. You can view criticism as a threat to your self-worth and fold, or you'll merely think about the source, forget about it, and go on about your business. It may be uncomfortable when a coworker accuses you of not carrying your load, however it isn't terrible. You do not have to believe what he says. He might think you are lazy, but there's no rule that says you would like to work out things the same approach he does.
The ability to handle criticism may be a very useful life skill. However before going any any, I think it's helpful to differentiate between 2 sorts of criticism: constructive ("friendly") and destructive ("unfriendly") criticism. The primary is meant to be useful, is often delivered by someone who cares concerning you and your feelings, and is typically welcome. The second is hurtful, delivered by someone who doesn't care, and is rarely welcome. Constructive criticism will be quite valuable: its purpose is to help you learn a thing or two about yourself, grow as someone, or improve your performance in an exceedingly sure area. Harmful criticism is neither valuable nor helpful: its purpose is to belittle, malign, and management you. When folks think of "criticism," they have an inclination to conjure up the negative images and feelings related to the damaging type.
Dealing effectively with either type of criticism involves knowing what to assume, say, and do. One among the first things you want to ask yourself when criticized is, "Is that this person's criticism valid?" Many times folks provide every other constructive criticism as a result of they care regarding and wish to help every other. Thus there is always the likelihood that a explicit criticism could be true. Then once more, folks are imperfect and generally give each alternative invalid criticism. Solely you'll decide what you will accept as true and what you won't. In the end, irrespective of the content of the criticism, it is usually necessary to recollect that each person is entitled to their own opinion.
At the center of over-sensitivity to criticism are numerous musts of perfection, approval, and comfort. Learning to tolerate criticism, then, involves rigorously disputing and difficult your Crazy-Makers. The 3 primary Crazy-Makers connected to criticism are:
1) I should be absolutely good in every respect; otherwise, I'm not a smart person, and no one will love me.
a pair of) Others must accept and approve of me in each respect; otherwise, I am not a good person, and life isn't price living.
three) I must solely hear what I wish to listen to, because I can not tolerate the discomfort of being attentive to somebody tell me regarding my faults.
In the final analysis, it is vital to challenge these varieties of beliefs whereas not taking criticism personally. Typically, the criticizer is commenting on something that you are doing, not on who you're as an individual. The hassle begins, though, after you personalize the criticism - when you apply what the opposite person says regarding your behavior to your self-worth. If you are ever tempted to do this, remember that you aren't what different people say or think concerning you.
Dispute your irrational thoughts, continue the facts, and forget the remainder of it. You'll save yourself a ton of headaches within the long run.
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Riley Jones has been writing articles online for nearly 2 years now. Not only does this author specialize in critical care, you can also check out his latest website about: