Am I kidding - kids that are out of control, violent, aggressive, confrontational, verbally abusive aren't a problem? That's right. I deal with them every working day. And they aren't the problem!
I let them have their own way and that's why they're no problem? You better believe I don't... no way.....
They're so under control they daren't speak? No, they're a happy, relaxed and contented bunch of kids.
I've been doing this job of managing extreme and out of control kids long enough to conclude that the kids aren't the stumbling block - the adults (whether at school or home) are the ones with the problems.
People in education, parents and carers constantly tell me that children's behaviour is getting worse and there's nothing they can do to manage and control children. They feel helpless against the onslaught of abuse and agression they meet so frequently. There is despair at their lack of ability to control the worsening situation in and out of school.
Why are these people so ineffective in their efforts to manage children's behaviour? They don't lack intellingence but are so out of their depth when dealing with bolshy and aggressive kids. They're negative - full of what they aren't able to do. Endless reasons and excuses why children's behaviour isn't being managed effectively.
Much of the professional advice offered to schools is wrong. Many people giving advice don't work at the chalk face so can't actually do the job they're advising about. This leaves the 'advisees' stuck with bad advice and the problem gets worse. The children know that the adults can't manage them and often take delight in adding to the problem. My first encounters with extreme behaviour were a disaster so I do understand what people are up against. Exhaustion, stress and the assumption that you can't do anything about the problem.
The great news is that you can do something about it - you can learn to manage children's behaviour confidently. Anyone can learn to do it - it's really not difficult. Get to grips with the techniques you need, practise them and use them all the time - be consistent. You'll soon become confident and the changes will astound you.
Adults have to accept the responsibility to keep children safe and a to put effective behaviour management strategies into place that ensure children learn to adhere to society's expectations - controlled until they have matured emotionally and able to take responsibility for their own behaviour.
Author Resource:
Liz Marsden manages children's extreme behaviour in the classroom on a daily basis. She trains teachers, students and classroom support day to day workers in effective behaviour management strategies. Her highly recommended book Behaviour Bible passes on the skills that Liz has developed so successfully. Her online diary follows her day to day work and experiences in classrooms and schools.
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