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Parenting Solutions - 3 Easy Steps in Dealing With an Oppositional Child



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By : aaron adish    99 or more times read
Submitted 2010-10-28 04:50:02
Parenting Solutions - 3 Easy Steps in Dealing With an Oppositional Child
Are you a parent with a defiant child? Are you pulling your hair out from opposition caused by your kid? If you're a parent who is tired of being tired, screaming at your kids, putting them in time-out, etc., then this text might be just what you are looking for.
Households that are confusing (overactive) cause additional confusion. Young children do not recognize a way to react to folks who come home from work tired and in need of peace and quiet - or how to house a household of siblings who additionally want and need attention. Therefore, negative attention, to a young kid, is better than none at all.
Understanding your child's would like for attention is the first step a parent should consider. It's perfectly natural for a kid to make demands. From the confines of the crib, a child learns to cry for attention. We have all heard regarding the "terrible twos". This often is the results of a toddler being curious and needing to explore. The parent tells him "No", but it is not satisfactory to him. His curiosity is overwhelming and he just has to grasp what's behind the closed cabinet.
Likewise, the curious and defiant child needs to 'do it his manner' and make the rules that pertain to him. "I do not need to go to bed" or "I don't wish to eat this food" may be a sign of independence at a very early age. So, how will a parent deal with such a strong willed and stubborn child?
The first step is to keep calm. Raising one's voice is scary and overbearing to a young child who will then cry and become obstinate. This, in turn, causes the parent to react negatively with words or actions. The cycle is repeated until one or the other offers in and/or collapses from exhaustion.
The second step for a parent is to stay consistent in his or her expectations of their child. Children will never learn what's expected of them if the parent does not show consistency in that regard. I assume back to my own childhood and sitting in school. My lecturers expected certain things from their students; and they made it abundantly clear on the first day of sophistication what those expectations were.
The third step is for parents to send a transparent message to the child in language they can understand. Be firm, however friendly. Have your kid repeat what the message is. Have them justify it back to you in their own words. Never argue with a defiant child. It will do no one any smart; not you, not your child. Years ago there was an old saying, "Kids ought to be seen and not heard." Although I do not adhere to that recommendation, I do have a tidbit of alternative recommendation for you:
Faux to be invisible to your defiant child. Fake to be deaf. In due course, he will get the message that his defiance brings no self-satisfying results. Within the meantime, right now, go offer her or him a massive hug and allow them to apprehend you love them. They're however very little simply once.

Author Resource:

Debbie Hamilton has been writing articles online for nearly 2 years now. Not only does this author specialize in Step Parenting, you can also check out latest website about


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