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Getting Help After a Breakup – Figure Out Why You Really Feel Bad



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By : Alicia Givens    99 or more times read
Submitted 2011-02-07 12:29:21
If you need help after a breakup, the best thing you can do is to focus on other positives in your life to get you through this difficult time. Some people may be surprised to find out that they still mourn the loss of their relationship, even though they may have been the one that ended it.

As we progress in a relationship, we often reach a level of comfort with the familiar. Sometimes this familiarity is what we become attached to even if we are less than satisfied with our significant other. Fear of the unknown keeps us in these less than satisfactory relationships, often for years. This then leads to difficulty in letting go even if we are in a situation that is not emotionally healthy. The question you need to ask yourself is, do you really love this person, or are you afraid of being alone?

One you can answer this question with honesty it will then become much easier to move on in your life. You might be surprised to find that if you were to list the positives and negatives of your former boyfriend or girlfriend, that the negatives out weight the positives. When looked at objectively, most people find that they really don't understand why they stayed in the relationship as long as they did.

In a lot of cases, people give up things that they enjoyed or people that they liked to hang out with. This exclusivity to the relationship can isolate you making it that much more difficult to recover once it's over. Re-connecting with old friends and becoming involved in activities that you once enjoyed will not only keep you busy but also make you feel productive and happy again.

If you find that your positives out weigh your negatives, you may have a little more difficult time in letting go. Getting help after a breakup can come in the form of friends and family who are supportive and understand what you're going through. One of the biggest obstacles in getting over a relationship is the negative self-image that it produces. If you weren't the one that ended the relationship, you might be feeling unworthy or unlovable. The truth is, that your former girlfriend or boyfriend may have simply felt you weren't compatible. If you can remove the emotions from your thought process for just a moment, you can see that you too have been in their position. The person you broke up with wasn't a bad person, but just wasn't right for you.

Understanding that because someone broke up with you doesn't mean that you're less loveable or unattractive will go a long way to healing and making yourself available for someone else. Getting help after a breakup is easy when you look at the possibilities with new eyes and a fresh outlook.

Author Resource:

For more information on how to Get Over A Breakup visit here. To see how to Get Over Divorce visit here.Getting Help After A Breakup

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