You play it over and over in your mind. Everything is normal and clear as you think about ideas. Then your reality shakes you awake when you remember, “I have no voice!” Nothing understandable will be coming out of my mouth. You not only hear your thoughts, but to hear your voice in your mind, and knowing you are going to be the only person that does! That’s when you would like to turn back the hands of time. Not to eliminate the disease that caused you to lose your voice because you could not control that. Rather, you would have used your voice and words differently. You realize what you say does make a difference to you and others. Perhaps the content of your conversations would be different, you express what your true thoughts. Politically correct becomes passé, and truth and candor become the norm. Listening is a huge part of talking if you are in a conversation. Ask yourself if you have ever been in a conversation, made a statement or asked a question, and the response was so totally off, you wonder if you were talking to an empty suit? Listening is so important.
This is what I can tell you as fact. Having no voice forces you to listen closely to what a person is saying. Here’s another fact, most people use little thought when they are talking. The thoughtlessness of people is astounding. The trigger is pulled, the words fire out, the results are random. Words are great cover for hidden agendas. Believe me that when you listen, really listen to what a person is saying (it could be a question or a statement) it becomes transparent as to their meaning. You can see through the words and by intuition or intelligence know what the “real” question or statement is. That is a real asset having lost your voice. Here is the reason why: as a voiceless person, you are judicious with what you do “say” in a conversation. You do not pontificate. Being more direct, quicker to the facts, you solicit a response that is on topic. The quality of the conversation is increased significantly. Does being voiceless a have value? It does if you don’t want to be stuck in self pity and hide from life. It is how you see yourself and your situation. Don’t let your lack of a voice define who you are, it is up to YOU to define who you are.
Here are some ideas on how to take control of a situation that many people can not imagine. First, accept the fact…. You have NO VOICE. That is your reality. Second, here are a couple of tools you can use that are a tremendous help. Go to Staples or anywhere that sells a 3 X 5 memo pads, and pencils. Writing a note, a question, or word will engage the other person immediately! Use your face with different expressions to go along with you notes. It is amazing how people will respond to you. Recently I had a 30 minute conversation at dinner using my note pad. It was a focused, personal, productive and enjoyable talk. Here is what happened too that I thought was interesting. The person would not only answer me with words, but frequently would write down a response back to me. They enjoyed the writing aspect of the conversation. It was enlightening and engaging. People seem to appreciate the effort. You know what you want to say and have a way of saying it. All this was done with the note pad and a pencil.
No big deal, yet it was because I was having a meaningful conversation.
Being voiceless is not my choice. Being active and finding ways to communicate is my choice. I encourage you to be proactive in dealing with this issue. Go to www.ListenToMeToday.com and you will end up at a blog that will have ideas and support for anyone facing a challenge. Life goes on, be a part of it….
Author Resource:
Three years ago my voice stopped working due to extensive radiation.I have found several ways to communicate. Prior to writing,I was in Senior management positions in the broadcasting (ABC,CBS,Salem Radio)and the publishing fields.COO of APB Media,"The Justice Journal". http://www.ListenToMeToday.com