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How to Ask Her Out in 5 Simple Steps



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By : Rick Freedom    99 or more times read
Submitted 2009-12-17 01:40:03
It seems so simple. You see a girl who catches your eye, so you ask her out. But truthfully, pursuing the woman of your dreams is easier said than done. What you should say or do is often overshadowed by the fear of rejection, leaving most men frozen in their tracks.

But the good news is that it does not have to be this difficult, as long as you do what comes naturally to you. So many men seek the advice of others when it comes to asking Ms. Right out on a date. The problem with this is that the preferences of outsiders tend to clash with the personal style of the individual, making for minimal success. As with anything in life, you cannot go wrong with being true to yourself.

And while the manner in which you ask a woman out is irrelevant, there are certain conditions to take into consideration before doing so. Read on to learn about five steps to get her to go out with you. You may recognize a lack of one or more of these practices in your own dating life, but it is never too late to improve your game. So, how do you ask her out?

One Thing at a Time

Consider the following scenario: you are at a house party, when you see a beautiful woman at the other end of the room. With a nice dose of “liquid confidence,” you approach her and start up a conversation. She seems nice enough, and no sooner than you learned her first name do you ask her out. Suddenly, she has to go “check on her friend.”

What went wrong here? Many guys make the mistake of treating women like lollipops in a candy store. “I’ll take that one!” They see a room filled with blondes, brunettes, and everything in between, and they think they can have their pick of whomever. In truth, women prefer to get better acquainted with a guy before moving onto any talk of a date. A better way to handle the above situation would be to use the night as an opportunity to get to know her. If (after some lengthy conversation) she or you are about to leave, then ask her if she would like to go out sometime. Never forget that women take longer to warm up than men do.

Get Her to Open Up

If you follow the above step by chatting with a woman, you should be able to tell if she is enjoying the conversation. Her body language, eye contact, and general response to you will speak volumes. If, on the other hand, she seems disinterested, you can either jump ship and move onto someone else, or continue engaging her.

If you choose the latter, try learning more about her. Ask her what her occupation is, who she knows at the party you two are at, what she does for fun, etc. While it is good to show interest in her, be careful to not lay it on too thick. With every response she gives, make sure to include some information about yourself to keep the conversation flowing. If, after a while, she seems to open up to you, then casually tell her you enjoyed talking with her and would like to see her again sometime. If she is still stone cold, move on. Do not ask her out.

Flatter Her…Moderately

It is no secret that women like to be admired. They put great care into their appearances, and their reputations are no less important. Therefore, it is important that you take the time to notice her assets, but not in excess.

For example, take into consideration our house party scene. You have approached that beautiful woman at the other end of the room, and seem to have established a certain rapport with one another. After a good ten minutes or so of conversation, compliment her knowledge on whatever subject you two are discussing. Once some more time passes, casually tell her how beautiful her eyes are, but go no further. Women (believe it or not) get hit on practically every day of their lives, so anything in excess from you will seem like the same old game to her.

Learn Body Language

It is true…actions really do speak louder than words. Body language is the non verbal cues resulting from subconscious reactions to our environments. Most people are unaware of the body language they reveal to others, and because of this, it is a great indicator of how another person is feeling.

If, when talking to a girl, she folds her arms across her chest and stares everywhere but into your eyes, odds are you are losing her. On the other hand, if her gaze remains on you, her smile beams brightly, and her body leans forward into your space, you are doing well. Generally speaking, it is not difficult reading a person’s body language; just be mindful to pay attention to it if you want good results when you ask her out.

Be Irresistible

If you follow the steps above, odds are you will be well on your way to winning a date. Through conversation, you should learn things about your mystery woman, such as her dating status, passions, and personality. If you like what you have learned, then go ahead and ask her out.

The key to being irresistible to a woman is to remain confident and relaxed when in her presence. Remember that women are attracted to a challenge, so a surefire method of turning her off is to appear overly eager. Lay on the charm at your leisure, and when you are finally ready to ask her out, do not come off as nervous or needy. Take on the mindset that you would like to go out with her, but you certainly do not need to, and odds are, you will land yourself a date.

While there is no guarantee on dating success, these five steps to get her to go out with you are certain to get you the results you seek. If at first you do not succeed with them, try again. If you do not ask her out, you have no chance. But if you make an attempt, you stand a chance. Remember that love is a game, and you have to play in order to stand a chance at winning. With these guidelines as your tools, you will be well on your way to doing so.

Author Resource:

Rick Freedom is an aspiring author and entrepreneur whose interests include communication, human relationships, love, dating and philosophy. For more dating advice, visit http://www.i1datingadvice.com

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