A lot of long relationships hit the stage when one partner feels that the other one is taking them for granted. However, this is not necessarily the sign of a failing relationship. There could be many reasons why it may appear that your boyfriend has been taking you for granted. The most common and likely one is that your partner has got into a comfort zone vis-à-vis the relationship, and no longer feels the need to develop it. It is natural human psychology that when you think something is already in the bag, you stop trying for it. However, with a little bit of effort from your end, you can bring your partner to cooperate with you and support you, and get the excitement back into your relationship.
1. Make Him Realize
You have to consider the possibility that your boyfriend is not fully aware of the significance of the change that has taken place, and its effect on you. The realization will not automatically dawn upon him and if you keep waiting for it, you will only add to your frustration. You need to take active steps to make your boyfriend realize that he has been taking you for granted. Simply criticizing him on his face with a broad generalization, such as 'you have been taking me for granted!' will not help. That will only lead to a fight and he will realize nothing.
2. Right Timing
You need to send across the message at the right time. So, the next time you have planned to go for an outing and he turns up late, without even bothering to inform you of the delay, don't wait for him. Leave a polite message for him that you left. He may still get upset and confront you, but the message will also hit him hard that you will not stand for such casual behavior. If you can get a genuine apology out of him and the assurance that he will try better in future, that is a step forward!
3. Staying Calm
If he has been casual about breaking significant news to you, or doesn't bother to keep you in the loop as far as things happening in his life go, share your grievance. However, once again, you need to choose the right moment. Tell him about it the next time he tells you at the last minute that he has made a plan with his friends. Besides, if you do it calmly and indicate in a very steady voice that you are hurt by this behavior, it will make a far more effective impact than an angry accusation.
4. Positive Approach
Whatever your grievance, what you should emphasize on, when you confront your boyfriend, is how you would like him to conduct himself rather than simply indicating all that is wrong with what he is currently doing. The idea is not to put him down by showing him how he is lacking. That will usually not work. Instead, focus on just how he can do better. He will be more regretful of his actions and appreciate you for that. The moment you notice the signs of failing relationship, take steps to save it as fast as you can. With these steps, you should be able to get back your boyfriend and re-discover your happy times
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