Hubby Dale and a guy friend sat on their boat knocking down a few beers and whiled away a lazy afternoon by listing body ations urination, expectoration, perspiration, etc. I tried, but failed, to imagine doing the same with a girlfriend. We would identify the three most important ations exfoliation, ovulation and menstruation, three these two geniuses missed and then go shoe shopping.
Like it or not, ations are part of life. When you re cheek by jowl it s impossible to pretend, as you do in those early getting to know each other days, that you re the only person on the planet who doesn t experience them. At some point, one or the other of you will fart, belch, or leave the bathroom in need of fumigation. One bit of relaxed behavior leads to another and before you know it, you re sharing perhaps over sharing all those ations.
It s not fair to stereotype but it seems to me that most guys never quite get over their middle school fascination with body functions, especially flatulation and eructation (belching). There s even a certain pride that some men take in ations as if the louder the belch or the more pungent the flatulence, the more manly they are. I. Do. Not. Get. It.
Okay, I admit it. I sometimes see the humor. Dale and I were at a Wednesday afternoon matinee, the favorite showing for folks from the retirement community. During a quiet moment Dale coughed so hard he ripped one. A really loud one. The elderly woman in front of Dale reached up and patted her head as if she feared the blast had dislodged her wig. We could not stop laughing and had to leave.
Then there s grooming. In a perfect world, we d all wake up as they do in the soaps perfect hair, perfect make up, no morning breath. You wouldn t need to floss or brush your teeth, clip your toenails, exfoliate, mud pack, shave, or file your calluses. It s soooooooooo not a perfect world.
I think most body functions and grooming should be done behind closed doors. Dale is more relaxed. I m convinced he d never seek privacy but for the fact that he reads on the john and doesn t want to be disturbed. Oddly, the one thing that grosses him out is watching me put my contacts on. You may consider that as weird as I do, but it does demonstrate an important point. When it comes to body functions and grooming, it s a good idea to know when you re crossing your sweetie s that s disgusting line.
We all have our quirks. Kathy is grossed out by teeth flossing, Elijah by ear wax on Q Tips. I need complete privacy to groom my feet. Nail clippings make Rebecca want to hurl. Respect your sweetheart s quirks and avoid the gross out.
It may be impossible to maintain the same level of propriety you would around a total stranger, but remember this: In an intimate relationship, there are times when less is more.
Author Resource:
Shela Dean is a relationship coach, speaker and Amazon bestselling author of Frequent Foreplay Miles, Your Ticket to Total Intimacy, available through http://Amazon.com and other book sellers. For more information, visit her website at http://www.FrequentForeplayMiles.com .