There is no doubt that we live in a world that regularly deluges us with messages about how we should feel about our bodies and about how inadequate we are, and some of the most vulnerable people out there to these messages are teenagers. Teenagers are extremely sensitive to the messages that are sent, whether approving or disapproving, and when so many of these messages are directed towards their desirability and their worth as it relates to their body, it can often feeling as though reinforcing self esteem is difficult to say the least! What can you do for your child or another teen that you are close to who is experiencing these feelings?
The way that a teen might express a dysmorphic body image will vary from teen to teen. Some teens are quite vocal about the fact that they hate their appearance while others are silent on the matter. Some will simply refuse to eat while others are far more subtle about their possibly harmful food habits. Remember that all teens are vulnerable to body image problems and eating disorders. It does not matter what they look like, whether they are dating someone or not, or whether they are male or female. Media as it stands inundates us with messages and simply the act of watching TV or going through a supermarket line can tell you that your body is not pretty enough, not thin enough, not white enough or not smooth enough.
Dealing with a teen who has issues with body image is not easy; sometimes it is like walking through a conversational landmine. Remember that above all, honesty is important. When you start being dishonest, even if it is only comfort them, you are casting doubt on your reputation as a reliable source. The most important thing is to keep the lines of communication open. For instance, if your teen says that he or she is too fat, stifle the immediate knee jerk response to say, “No, you re not!” Instead, a more profitable line of reasoning might be to ask them why they feel this way. This can help you understand where they are getting the message from.
Another important thing to think about is control. Remember that many teens experience eating disorders and other image problems because they feel that they are out of control and need to hang on to something. Speak with your teen about this and think about what might help them establish more control over themselves or to understand that they do have control.
Remember to set a good example. Teens who constantly hear their parents talk about their weight or their appearance are going to internalize some nasty lessons. Do you talk about how overweight you are or do you make fun of other people for their appearance? Do you constantly diet or do you talk about foods being “good” or “bad”? Listen to yourself and make sure that you are not giving your child the wrong idea.
Don t be afraid to seek help. Speak with your teen about counseling and also consider making them an appointment with a dietitian. An expert can help you find a path through these occasionally tumultuous times.
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